I'm addicted to comic books. That doesn't really fit the song I guess. I'm not really sure how to differentiate between an addiction and a hobby. In my monthly budget I actually set aside $100 for comics, and I enjoy reading them every week. Without fail, I pick them up on Thursday, the day after they come out, in order to avoid the Wednesday crowd. The comic book store people all know my name and talk nerd talk when I come in. I give them at least $1200 a year in business. But I don't really think that makes me an addict. On a side note, the books I mainly buy are big superhero books (Batman, Spider-man, Daredevil, etc). But being in a writing program, every time I say I buy comics people always say something like "Oh, Maus is good. Have you read 'Ballistic Cunt?' It's a graphic novel inspired by feminist readings of Foucault." (Idea copyright Glenn Shaheen, everybody, so hands off). Then I always have to explain that superhero books are not really as dumb as they think, or as dumb as they were in the early 90s, but it's pretty much like telling a creative writing grad student that you really love Stephen King. For those of you who don't know, creative writing grad students are really pretentious. It's probably a good idea not to socialize with them or admit to other people that you even know any. I usually tell people I'm getting my MFA in botany, or the science of socks, or something.
As far as other things go, I've been watching Star Trek lately, but I'm slowly just trying to work my way through the episodes, so that's not an addiction. Once a long time ago I smoked cigarettes for a year just because I hated those "Truth" adds they used to have on TV that implied smoking was worse than Hitler. Remember that one? Let me see if I can find it.
Hey, Youtube is great! Anyway, I guess watching it now it doesn't really imply that smoking is worse than Hitler, but it's still a pretty offensive ad by implying they're similar. And at the time I thought it would be poetic justice for me to start smoking when Truth wanted me to not smoke, since the ads were making me feel bad anyway. I showed them! Well, except I never told Truth about it, and they probably didn't care, and I quit after a year.
Wikipedia is pretty much an addiction. There are nights when I will be exhausted and I will just stay up for hours past when I am tired following a hypertext trail through wikipedia articles. Though on the bright side I think I could totally kick everybody's ass in Jeopardy! now.
Also I'm a huge porn addict. It was actually me who found this blog by looking for Britney Spear's vagnia. Sorry guys! I'll try to type more clearly next time I use google to search for naked celebrities, like Paris Hilton naked in jail, or Lindsay Lohan fully nude, or Hilary Duff topless, or Ryan Seacrest elephantitis , or Brad Pitt skin pendulum.
That last paragraph was just written to get us some more hits.
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6 comments:
Vagina.
There. Maybe now we can get some hits from people who can spell.
:-)
You know, I think that in real life now I don't say the word "vagina" when referencing Britney Spears. I just say "vagnia." And yes, you'd be surprised how many times I've had to refer to Britney Spears' genitalia in the past few months.
Vagnia is the new vagina... Didn't you know?
And I totally just found this site incidentally whilst searching for Brad Pitt Skin Pendulum (I'm uh... doing a research project.)
$100 could buy you all 5 Promethea graphic novels, Scooter. Think about it.
You forgot Justin Timberlake bondage/snuff.
That's what I like.
My house is full of comics. At least Glenn will talk to me. :)
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