Almost perfectly cast

For years I wished that someone would come along and create a film version of the Lord of the Rings that would do justice to the books... and then Peter Jackson did. I loved his LOTR films. Yes, there are plenty of things that appear in the books which didn't make it into the movie. (How many people who just want to see an action flick would get into action-hero Aragorn reciting poetry? Or that diversion with Tom Bombadil? Great writing, but not essential to the plot. Of course, I'm still disappointed that there was no Scouring of the Shire, as I felt that chapter exemplified the growth of its characters over the course of the story. I'm also annoyed that Jackson didn't do more to show that Eowyn and Faramir fall in love, other than having them stand next to one another while smiling.) Yes, there were some scenes which weren't actually penned by Tolkien (Elves coming to Helm's Deep? Arwen kicking ass? Faramir taking Frodo to Osgiliath?) but which I felt did work well into a movie.

I've mentioned before how absolutely thrilled I was with Peter Jackson's choice of Orlando Bloom for Legolas in his LOTR trilogy... and I think Jackson did a splendiferous job in his casting choices for LOTR *except* for his choice of Liv Tyler as Arwen. Yeah, he gets points for giving her a sword and letting her save Frodo from the Ringwraiths, but Liv Tyler? For those who never read the books, Arwen is supposedly the most beautiful woman (er, elf) on the planet. Can you honestly tell me that this chick is the most beautiful woman you've ever seen?

I'm not entirely sure who I would choose as the most beautiful woman in the world (suggestions?) but not Liv!

For some reason she was also cast as Tatyana in the 1999 screen adaptation of Pushkin's Eugene Onegin. As a lover of Russian lit and language, I've read Onegin quite a few times (in both English and Russian, I might add). For those who aren't familiar with the story, there's this rich cat Onegin who is essentially above it all - love, duty, responsibility - he's wholly disinterested... and then he runs across this Tatyana chick and she totally discombobulates his reality. He falls hard. Again... Liv Tyler?? Are you kidding me?

Legolas!!!

I have been a huge fan of Tolkien's Lord of the Rings since I was a little kid. In many ways I had a crush on all of the Fellowship (well, except Boromir) as well as Eomer and Eowyn. However, my crush on most of them was pretty platonic - I simply would have loved to have hung out with them, gone adventuring with them. (One of the biggest problems with LOTR is its lack of kickass female characters, although Eowyn is one of my favorite fictional characters of all time. I also have to admit that I didn't fully understand her until I was 19 and went through my first serious case of heartbreak. And really, what was Aragorn thinking?) But when it comes to fantasy crushes, I must admit that I have always been rather obsessed with elves. And not the type of elves that hang out with Santa (those are more like Tolkien's dwarves), but the tall, androgynous, other-wordly beings of Middle Earth. (There are certainly other fantasy writers who have depicted elves in a similar fashion, but none with the beauty and elegance of Tolkien's. After all, in the Tolkien mythos, elves were the first of Eru's (er, "god's") flesh and blood creations. I'd had quite a dreamy crush on Legolas, as the elven representative in the Fellowship, and when I first heard that Peter Jackson was going to film the LOTR trilogy, my first thought was a worry that Legolas would be presented in a way that would simply kill my longterm crush. Luckily for me, Jackson's choice was perfect:

And speaking of hotties with bows and arrows, I know I mentioned a while back that I quite enjoyed Season One of the BBC's latest incarnation of Robin Hood, and am avidly awaiting Season Two. Anyway, I have crushed on Robin Hood pretty much all of my life, although I must say that the choice of Jonas Armstrong was most excellent.

And, of course, this is my original crush right here.

Now, something I should probably mention... I've also had a bit of a thing for The Bad Guy over the years. When I was a kid, watching Star Wars for the first time, I totally thought that Leia should get with Darth Vader and turn him from the Dark Side. That was, of course, before I saw Return of the Jedi and learned that Vader was her father. Whoops. Believe me, that fantasy went away right then and there.

Since I frequently imagined myself as a tenth member of the Fellowship when I read LOTR, I also managed to create a Sauron-converting fantasy. It wasn't a particularly long-lasting fantasy though.

Now I wouldn't really call this a fantasy, but the dude is hot and his character - despite being an evil bastard - actually has depth and I found myself feeling rather a bit sorry for him. I can totally understand fantasizing about changing him... although luckily for me, I've grown out of that phase. Dating one "bad guy" in real life was enough for me.

I still think he's pretty damn attractive though!

Then there's Gaius Baltar of Battlestar Galactica. I don't hate him, per say, but I strongly dislike and wholeheartedly despise the self-serving little shit.

Frack you, Gaius.