Now, is that in Korean Years or International Years?

Let me preface this post by saying that I currently live and work in Daegu, South Korea.

I was born in September of 1978, and my current age is 30. Obviously, if you do the math you’ll find a bit of a discrepancy; you’ll find that I’m actually 28½. Or at least that’s what you’ll find if you’re not here in Korea.

Here in Korea, the moment you pop out of your mom’s belly, you’re considered to be one year old. Then every Seollal (lunar new year) your age is increased by one. So according to Korean age reckoning, I was one year old as of September 25, 1978, and by Lunar New Year 1979 I was two.

Seollal was last Sunday, so as of last Sunday I turned 30. If I were a Korean, no doubt my friends and family would be quite worried about the fact that I am now thirty years old and yet I am still single. (As it is, every Korean I meet asks me three things: Where are you from? How old are you? and Are you single? Here in Korea, asking someone if he or she is single is just as common and innocuous as asking someone back in the States So where do you work?) Getting married is EXTREMELY IMPORTANT here, to the point that family members will look down upon older, unmarried relatives, especially women. If a Korean woman is still single at 30, this is generally considered a Big Problem. This makes it rather unfortunate that Korean women only have 28 years before hitting the big three-oh.

Now, as I am the oldest blogger here at the Supergroup, I’ve taken the liberty of posting twice. So scroll down and read my second post!

How TV reminds me that I'm getting older

One of the Korean TV channels had a day-long Prison Break marathon the other day, and I watched a good chunk of it. I spent a good portion of my Prison Break watching time trying to figure out where I’d seen the actress who plays lawyer Veronica Donovan before. Finally, I gave in to curiosity and googled the show.

Turns out the actress is Robin Tunney, who played Sarah Bailey, the main character in The Craft. Remember that movie? It came out during my senior year of high school. Back in high school I was part of an extremely tight-knit, very cliquish group of friends called the Round Floor. (Yes, we had a name.) When The Craft came out, a girl who had known the Round Floor for a long time told me that the movie reminded her of us. (The girl was Karen K, for anyone who might be wondering.) At the time I totally didn’t see the connection, but looking back, we were a pentagram shy of a coven. (WD40 anyone?) Somehow, seeing “Sarah Bailey” all grown up was really rather disconcerting.

Left: Sarah Bailey; Right: Veronica Donovan

And just in case you needed a reminder of The Craft...

Similarly, I’ve been a fan of crime dramas for years and years. Recently, I found myself wondering why all the actors and actresses cast to play the prosecuting attorneys were so young… then it occurred to me that they’re all probably roughly my age! Hell, I have friends from college and one ex-boyfriend who are now lawyers, so it’s certainly feasible.

Lastly, I recently discovered the BBC’s newest Robin Hood series. It’s incredibly cheesy, but the star, Jonas Armstrong, is simply gorgeous. I ran him through wikipedia and discovered that I am three years older than him! Something about being older than Robin Hood is seriously unnerving. It’s not going to stop me from ogling him though.

Yummy.

I could crush your skull - like a nut - but I'm not going to - because I need you.

I'm really not sure what to say about this week's topic. I'm not exactly sure what it is I'm supposed to write about. Do I feel old? Not really; sometimes I do, maybe when I'm talking to people younger than me, like my younger brother, who's ten years younger than I (when I realize he will be 17 this year, that *does* make me feel slightly "old"), but most of the time, actually, I feel very young. I am the youngest person where I work.

I can't really look at pop culture and decide whether or not that makes me young or old- I have almost always derided most things that are "popular." Anymore, things that are popular have a shelf life of a few days, so trying to keep up with what's hip, for someone with a job and a life, would be impossible. I do get nostaligic sometimes- once a year I will listen to 80s music for a couple of days and get nostalgic for being young and riding in my mom's car, listening to shitty mix stations on the radio. But that only lasts a couple of days. Personally, I hate nostalgia. It's like a disease.

The only thing that makes me feel "old" in a strange way is when I look at people I know and what they are doing. The main thing is that I am still in college, and won't be graduating until I am 28. That makes me feel, not necessarily old, but kinda crappy. I got started late; I hated LCCC, but had to get a full-time job so commuting out of town was not happening, and more flexible classes like hybrid courses or distance learning weren't as widely known or available, so I didn't go to school. Then I screwed around for a few years. I always knew I'd go back, but I waited a little longer than I wanted to. My hometown also sucked the life out of me. My big "growing-up" moment came when I finally decided to stop screwing around, and that meant moving away from my hometown. Then I started going back to school. Plus it took me that long to figure out exactly what I wanted to do, which I'm glad I did- had I just gone to school for whatever, I would likely be very unhappy now. I managed to figure out what I wanted to do, and now I am hugely passionate about it and very happy with it. But it took a while. Which I think is not abnormal. But it does make me feel "old" in relation to some of my friends who got their degrees already. Though I did manage to get lucky and get a job where I got promoted to making a decent living while I am in school. I don't know if it makes me feel "old" just as much as regretful that it took me so long to get my shit together.

I also feel strange when I think about the people I know who are my age and younger who got married. Usually, I feel like I am still way too young to do that- but sometiems, and this is probably due to where I grew up (rural, conservative, old-fashoined), sometimes it does make me feel old, since I haven't made some sort of huge life committment like getting married (that being the primary one), or buying a house, etc. But when I consider that almost every single one of my friends who got married got a divorce, and the few that didn't have had a hard time in their marriage and have thought about divorcing or getting separated, and all those horror stories, I feel vindicated. People these days are not getting married so quickly. I read an article a few years ago that talked about how "adolescence" is lasting well into the mid and late twenties (and it would probably tell you something about me to know that I saved that Time magazine issue and still have it). People aren't jumping right into a career right after high school, and people aren't sticking with one career or employer for their entire lives. Maybe it's natural, since people live a little longer. Who knows. But I don't feel old. Yet.

But I can say that I like myself now *infinitely* more than I did, say, six years ago. Six years ago I wouldn't even tuck in my shirt, not for anything. I think I didn't even tuck in my shirt for a job interview once. I refused to "dress up." I hated it. Now, I literally have about 75 ties. I realized a couple of weeks ago that 95% of my clothes are "dress" clothes; I had to go out and buy a new pair of jeans and some t-shirts. At work, when I started, my position didn't require a shirt and tie, but I wore them anyways because I really wanted to (and I got promoted to management- the old bromide "dress for success" must mean something). That's one way that I can see how much I've changed. Besides other personal things, such as my confidence level, my shyness, etc., which have also changed.

As far as using pop culture as a guage to see if one is old or young, that's not helpful for me. I've always liked things that are beneath the radar. If anything, the desire to seek out strange, obscure and eclectic music (and movies, though I don't get to watch a lot of movies) has only gotten stronger- I think this has a direct link to the other, more boring parts of my life. I mean, I almost exclusively read political and policy books (for fun!) and I watch an extensive amount of C-Span and news shows and read dozens of political blogs every day. So my musical and movie tatste have increasingly become more and more eclectic and strange.

It's all relative, I guess. I'm the youngest at work, yet often I act the most mature. Everyone has a different definintion of what is young and old. One thing, I will say, that does make me very acutely aware of my advancing age (though does not necessarily make me feel "old") is that I haven't "done" a lot of things that I'd like to do. I'm not "disappointed" with my life, but I haven't got to do a lot. For one thing, I never leave Florida. I haven't left the state of Florida in probably ten years. In my defense, Florida is not an easy state to get out of. From where I live, it would take me close to 9 or 10 hours to leave Florida, and then it's Georgia, which doesn't excite me. And I just haven't had the money/resources to fly places. I just haven't been able to do a whole lot. Of course, that doesn't bother me too much- I plan to vacation somewhere this year, and plan to move out of Florida altogether next year. Other things that I have never done, and am probably now a little past the point where I should start to try them, are things like drugs or something. But seriously, I probably haven't done as much as I'd like to have done by this age, but that doesn't make me feel too horrible. I'm stretching here.

I'm not sure if this is what I was supposed to write about. It's a tough one. I'm very introspective, but I don't spend any time thinking about old and young. There are times when I feel very young, as I can be extremely silly, and I work with people older than me. And there are times when I feel like I am getting older, like when I'm around people younger than myself. There have been moments where I have suddenly felt like I'm too old for my age, as all I do is go to work and then read about politics and public policy- so then I'll feel a need to do something to offset that, or feel the need to reevaluate what I'm doing or something. But those are fleeting moments. It has been a bit of a fight within myself at times to do what I feel is right, and not something based on different perceptions of old and young; where I grew up, it's very old fashioned- people ask "when are you getting married" etc. But, I moved to an urban area, and that sort of attitude is not very prevalent- most people here have told me not to get married until I am older, and most of my co-workers, while older than me, are single. So whatever, I do what I'm gonna do.

Working blues

When I started my last job, about 6 months after graduation, the interns were older than me. This caused some problems with one or two who 1.) kept calling me "Ms. Smither" and 2.) ignored me when I gave them tasks. Pompous jerks. At my current job, happily, I'm right at the median age.

Age is a strange thing these days. I have some friends right out of school in their early 20s (and some of their friends are still 18 or 19), and others in their early to mid 30s. Being 25, it's not too weird to hang out with any one in that range (although my behavior changes a bit), but I understand it when the 32-year-old says she feels awkward drinking with the 21-year-old.

What gets to me a little more is what I call the "Office Space Phenomenon." for example, this morning I rode the bus into work with a co-worker and we discussed the pros and cons of our neighborhood dry cleaners. Agag! Am I so boring?! To be fair, we later talked about bands we were going to download from iTunes after seeing them live. But you get the point. My usual lunch conversation revolves around network TV shows that aired the night before, and my neighbors are having their second annual Oscar party this weekend.

So, for me at least, the real measure of my age feels more acute as I notice my immersion in pop culture. It reflects for me that adult, work-a-day, water cooler socialization. I'm not too old to rebel, but I am old enough to see that "rebellion" is just as conformist as watching the latest Alan Sorkin show.

Man, I'm sleepy. Where's that intern with my next cup of coffee?

Late Mid Twenties

Well, being 26, I am in my late mid-twenties. In May, when I turn 27, I will be in my early late-twenties. This is something I've developed in order to make things sound a little more palatable as I get older.

Certainly in my life there have been things that have made me feel old. Like seeing Full House on Nick at Nite, having my younger brother and younger sister get married before me, or seeing Halloween 4 on American Movie Classics. Well, just kidding about that one. Everybody knows AMC is the worst channel in history. I mean, come on. They show fucking American Pie on that channel.

But probably what consistently reminds me of my age is teaching my college freshman. I mean, it wasn't so long ago that I myself was a college freshman, skipping lots of math classes and staying up until 4 every night with my roommate for absolutely no good reason other than we could. (We were pretty big losers, so we didn't have a lot of friends). This semester, though, I'm teaching Maus, Watchmen, and Dark Knight Returns, all written in the mid to late 80s. I find that I'm constantly having to explain the general political climate of the time, and how that might affect their reading of these works, because most of them were alive for only two years of the 80s, tops. I mean, we talk about the Reagan administration a little bit, and to be fair I wasn't actually in America for that, but I pretty much have to educate them from scratch. Their general knowledge of Reagan is that he single handedly broke the Berlin wall with his fists and destroyed the Soviet Bloc with one wink. Just kidding of course. They have no idea what the Berlin wall or Soviet Bloc are.

But do I feel old? I mean, I'm older than these kids, certainly. And I don't really ever get carded anymore, unless I go to a bar where college students go. And I have a couple of grey hairs. And I'm not really in shape. (Though some may argue that I wasn't ever in shape to begin with, and some may be right). And I'm in a stuffy graduate program. And I have two cats. And I pretty much always use metamusil and viagra. And I complain that things were better before all these whippersnappers were running around. And I go to Shoneys at 4:30 for dinner every Sunday. And I have to buy pre-chewed food. And my grandkids never call, the goddamned little ingrates. And I have a healthy collection of 78s, that don't quite hold up to the quality of phonographic cylinders. And I drive in a very annoying manner to young folk.

But on the other hand, my ideal day is probably spent reading comic books and playing video games. Also, my apartment is decorated in action figures and movie posters. So maybe I'm old in some ways, and young in the important ways.

PS - I don't need viagra, just to clarify. That was a joke. I was being facetious. I am one hundred percent fine in the special area. No viagra for me, thanks. Honest.

"I'm 37, I'm not old"

Well I was trying to think of something really bizarre to write about, and one of the kids from my church suggested bedsheets. Definitely weird, but after skiing all weekend, I don't think I could muster enough creativity to write my own post about bedsheets, so consider yourselves safe for now.

I've actually been thinking a lot about age lately - maybe this is from being around people at least 7-8 yrs younger than I this weekend. I was thinking about how much age is perceived differently, not only as you get older, but in society in general. For example, turning 30 used to be a big deal. There are all sorts of scenes in sitcoms and movies where people are agonizing over being the big 3-0. I don't know about the rest of you, but who cares? 30 isn't old, and yet these people act as if it's the end of the world (of course it's funnier that way). Maybe when I get closer to 30 I'll feel differently, but I don't think so - I've never thought of that age as old, except maybe when I was 5.

However, maybe I was just mature about aging when I was younger. I actually had 2 kids at the library basically tell me I was old the other day. These two guys (about 13-14) were hitting on some girls, and in general giving me grief. One of them said "I bet you had a lot of guys chasing after you when you were young" (a poor attempt to suck up). I said "What do you mean 'when I was young'?" His friend hit him and said, "She's still young". The first one goes "What are you, 21?". "No, a little older than that.", "24?", "No a little older.", "29?!". OK - big jump there from 24 to 29, but the fact that his first guess was 21 is a little disheartening. I mean, I guess it's a compliment if I look 4 yrs younger than I am, but it's disheartening because he was implying that 21 was old.

I used to think 50 was pretty old too, but now that my parents and friends' parents are hitting that age, it's not that way anymore. I mean, it still sounds old - but when I look at the people I know who are that age, it doesn't match the image that was conjured in my mind when I was younger.

Part of this is probably my perception of age changing as I get older, but I think society as a whole is changing. People are getting married and having kids later. If this were 20 yrs ago, all of us on this blog would probably be married and maybe have kids, but as it is none of us are. Maybe it's because life spans keep getting longer. I mean, back when people only lived to be about 40, they were married with kids at 13. Maybe we're getting smarter - we're waiting to get married and have kids once were more responsible and financially stable. Or maybe we're just more selfish - waiting to live out our single lives as long as we can before settling.

Of course there are still plenty of people who get married and have kids right out of high school. One of which is my new coworker, with whom I went to school. She was telling me about her husband and kids, and she asked if I had any. I replied no, but I know I had a look of utter shock and horror at the question. (That's something I really should work on) I tried to cover, but it just didn't work. I can't imagine having any children right now, much less having any when I was 18. (I could have a 7 yr old right now!)

As much as I hate people 10 yrs younger than me thinking I'm old, I guess I do the same to them - that is think that they're really young - just kids. It's funny hanging out with my Sr. High youth @ church - we like a lot of the same movies and music and they're really cool. However a song will play - like the Undone Sweater song by Weezer, and I'll stop and think "Wow - they were like 6 when this song came out - weird."

So I guess this week's topic is age - how you perceive it, how society perceives it, how you think people a certain age should act - that type of stuff.

Oh and props to Laurie for giving us a shoutout via bulletin on myspace.